I am considering new and different ways to cure my almost four year old from the constant screaming and yelling at her brothers and saying mean things to them. I was wondering what other parents thought of soap in the mouth? This was done to me as a child, and it worked. Not to mention I am still alive. However I am not so sure considering the way times have changed. I am all for it, but would never want to be accused of child abuse. So, what do other parents out there think? Is putting a little soap in the mouth of a child as discipline child abuse or not?
I really want to thank all of you guys for your answers so far. I did want to point out that I have tried most of the things that you are suggesting or I never would have gotten to this point of even considering the soap. I also wanted to point out that I meant a little on the finger then in the mouth for the taste, not that I drown her in it or anything. I have had some experience at the parenting thing.....I did feel she may be too young yet thats why I asked. I have sat down and had another talk with the two brothers she is doing this to and explained to them that she probably does this to get their attention because they often times do ignore her. (mostly because she yells everything) I just hope it subsides some before the new baby comes in September.
have you ever taken time to study achild? they want to be like big people and do what they do.on the other side they want to feel big so they adventure and actually make mistakes i have brought children who are not mine so i dont beat them but they are displined and my own are aliving example
actually michelle think will they know what you are up to?are they styling up? i prefer to to sit down as aparent and tell achild that is bad.these children think it would be better for u `to know why they do bad things and counsel them speak to them like big persons you will see
Hi Michelle! What do you do now? How do your older kids react? How old are the other kids? Your daughter is screaming for a reason, you just have to figure out what the reason is. I think I would try positive reinforcement with maybe a sticker chart. Give her a sticker for each time she uses her nice voice and even when she has to be reminded and stops right away. Start over each day. Give her 5 minutes of your time before bed. One more book before bed. Big girl kind of things. What is your goal? Your daughter needs to understand so it needs to be clear and in her language. (Re. Use your nice voice to your brothers) Have her demonstrate her nice voice and her mean voice to make sure she understands your expectations. Talk to your boys. Get their help. Some cheering and verbal praise from older siblings goes a long way. If one of your boys spontaniously started cheering for his little sister when she talked nice to him, you can bet that she is going to remember that. Also, sit your daughter down with mommy and me time to talk....like snuggled up in a chair or coloring together. Take that time to ask her what makes her happy and what makes her sad and what makes her angry. This will open the door to her needs. She may turn the question on you so be ready to answer. Good luck! Judy
There are a couple of potential problems that might arise. One - your daughter might further resent her siblings, seeing them (and not her behavior) as the reason she's getting punished. Two - she's three, and sorry, but that's WAAAY too young to take such drastic measures. I have to say that just because something works, doesn't necessarily make it the best course of action. Three and four year olds have a constant need for attention (as we're finding out with our son, also four), and this may be her way of trying to get it; kids at that age are still learning right from wrong, and yes, times have changed in that there are a lot of great resources available to parents that can help you TEACH your kids, rather than simply punish them. I would recommend that you send your question to one of Parentricity's Experts for some tips on how to help your daughter change her behavior.
somethings done in the privacy of your own home are your familys business--personally i wish more people would discipline their children, a little soap in the mouth will make him think twice- i dont see it as a form of abuse-this is only my opinion of course
